Medieval-Man's Monster Thread (Retired)

Creating game materials? Monsters, spells, classes, adventures? This is the place!
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MedievalMan
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Thu Mar 07, 2013 11:08 pm

I will check that, I know as originally presented they are invisible and appear a white mist when see with a see invisibility spell. But other than that I cannot remember for the life of me what got changed.

tl;dr
Let me get back to you shortly.
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MedievalMan
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Thu Mar 07, 2013 11:10 pm

SmootRK wrote:Noted that Duergar is an SRD monster (and Open). That does not mean that we MUST COPY IT. There is no reason that we cannot have our own BFRPG take on the idea, about the same but subtlety our own flavor. If we do utilize them directly, I would suggest looking to the 1e or 2e in order to be truer to the roots of the idea.
Oh when I wrote the duergar I did it all from my own hazy memory of playing World of Warcraft (Blackrock Depths y u so awesome?). So honestly, they are less D&D duergar than they are Warcraft Dark Iron dwarves. Should be no problems as written.
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MedievalMan
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Thu Mar 07, 2013 11:15 pm

MedievalMan wrote:I will check that, I know as originally presented they are invisible and appear a white mist when see with a see invisibility spell. But other than that I cannot remember for the life of me what got changed.

tl;dr
Let me get back to you shortly.
Okay I did a bad thing and mostly copied what was written and swapped words around. :oops:

I would rewrite the descriptive text completely, minus the description as a cloud of white mist and the speaking in strange languages bit.
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SmootRK
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Thu Mar 07, 2013 11:38 pm

MedievalMan wrote:
MedievalMan wrote:I will check that, I know as originally presented they are invisible and appear a white mist when see with a see invisibility spell. But other than that I cannot remember for the life of me what got changed.

tl;dr
Let me get back to you shortly.
Okay I did a bad thing and mostly copied what was written and swapped words around. :oops:

I would rewrite the descriptive text completely, minus the description as a cloud of white mist and the speaking in strange languages bit.
hmmm. I am pretty sure that I did some edits to this as well (per my little discourse on info flow). I don't have source material to compare. Can you double check to see if this can be salvaged?
---------------
Odeum*
Armor Class: 16 ‡
Hit Dice: 4*
No. of Attacks: 1 touch
Damage: 1d6 + wisdom drain
Movement: 60' Fly
No. Appearing: 1
Save As: Fighter: 4
Morale: 12
Treasure Type: C
XP: 280

The odeum is an undead spirit that feeds on fear and terror, trying to take control of living beings and force them to perform unspeakably evil acts. They are not tied to particular areas and can move about at will. odeums appear as a seething cloud of luminous white vapor. An odeum speaks in a low whisper and knows all the languages it knew in life, which are not necessarily the same languages of their host.

An odeum damages a creature's mind with but a touch. In addition to normal damage, a creature so touched by an odeum takes 1d4 points of Wisdom damage. A creature reduced to less than 3 Wisdom by such means is driven insane and acts as if under the effects of a Confusion spell until their Wisdom is restored to at least 3 points.

The odeum can attempt to possess a creature at will. This ability is similar to the spell magic jar as cast by a 10th level Magic-User, except that it does not require a receptacle. If the attack succeeds, the odeum disappears into the targets body. The target can resist the attack with a successful save vs spells modified by the targets Wisdom bonus. A creature that successfully saves is immune to that odeums possession attack for the next 24 hours. While possessing a host the odeum takes complete control of the targets actions, though the host remains aware of what is happening around it. Attacking a host creature will damage the body (but not the odeum); a host that dies will cause the odeum to return to its nebulous form.

Outside a host (see below), an odeum can only be struck by magical weapons and spells. Like all undead they are immune to sleep, charm, and hold spells. They can be turned by a cleric (as wraiths). However, while inside a host the odeum is rendered immune to a clerics turning ability, though the ability allows the host to make a save vs Spells to expel the odeum. Such a save can only be made once per day.

They tend to use a host until it reaches such levels of horror to be driven mad. At this point the odeum abandons its host to seek out another victim.
-------------------------
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MedievalMan
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Thu Mar 07, 2013 11:53 pm

"The odeum is an foul undead spirit that possesses living creatures and drives them to madness. They are formed from the souls of the murderously insane and seem driven to force other creatures to perform the same acts they did in life. Unlike many other spectral undead an odeum is not tied to a specific location and can move about at will, though it is drawn to places of great suffering and torment. An odeum speaks the languages it knew in life, though its voice sounds like an eerie echo."

"They will ride a host for as a long as possible until they reach such levels of anguish as to be driven mad. The odeum then abandons the host to seek out a new victim."

Alright the above is 100% completely original fluff text. Hopefully it will redeem me for my rampant case of stupid.
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SmootRK
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Fri Mar 08, 2013 12:22 am

MedievalMan wrote:Alright the above is 100% completely original fluff text. Hopefully it will redeem me for my rampant case of stupid.
Dude, you really got to stop that self-depreciation stuff... never even once thought of anything here as "stupid".

I will see about more edits as you provided.
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MedievalMan
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Fri Mar 08, 2013 12:27 am

Alright! I look forward to seeing how it turns out.
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SmootRK
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Fri Mar 08, 2013 9:12 am

I applied the revised text. I cannot know (since I don't have that source material) how close it comes to the original, so others will have to tell me if it is too close.
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MedievalMan
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Fri Mar 08, 2013 1:47 pm

Like I said I came up with it on my own, so it should be 100% original.

If you want a reference I found the Odem from 2nd edition for comparison.
http://www.lomion.de/cmm/odem.php

Its pretty much the exact same thing as the denizens of dread version. Though the DoD version is much longer winded.
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SmootRK
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Re: Medieval-Man's New Monster Creations

Post Fri Mar 08, 2013 6:08 pm

MedievalMan wrote:Like I said I came up with it on my own, so it should be 100% original.

If you want a reference I found the Odem from 2nd edition for comparison.
http://www.lomion.de/cmm/odem.php

Its pretty much the exact same thing as the denizens of dread version. Though the DoD version is much longer winded.
I am hoping for a third party opinion. I am afraid I am a tad pessimistic. Small details aside, seems like the same creature.

Bear in mind my opinion, one cannot simply re-write the text (leaving things largely intact otherwise). It would be like me deciding to write a movie about a endearing young man who decides to take the day off with a couple of his friends. This Farris Beuneor has great adventures in New York, close calls with the truancy officer and his own parents, and even gets to Marshall for the Macy's Parade. What a great Day Off!

You see, I have many small differing details, but it is plain that this story is wholly based upon another great piece of film. "I could be the Walrus", ya know. Anyhow, I would never get away with it.

So, extra opinions please!

Also bear in mind that when it comes to actual Open Content.... this is all irrelevant. Bring it on... though I do prefer our own BFRPG versions when possible.
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