Eastover Patrol (NEW) & The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

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Eastover Patrol (NEW) & The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Tue Oct 31, 2017 5:00 pm

UPDATE 7/28/18: Added the new story Eastover Patrol to the OP. I quite like this one, personally. I'd love to hear thoughts on it (good or bad). As always, thanks to anyone who takes the time out of their busy lives to read it!

10/31/2017: Hey, everyone. I intentionally left out detailed descriptions of the local because the last thing I want to do is step on anyone's toes regarding the setting. For the beta version of the story, I pictured the city to be in the southernmost part of the Demonfrost Mountains, but it could easily be moved to somewhere else, or, of course, nowhere if my writing isn't liked by anyone. The story itself isn't an adventure, but more of a "lore" type tale that establishes a mountainous ruined city for present day BFRPG. Of course, all comments, negative or positive, are welcome. For anyone who takes the time to read it.....THANK YOU and much appreciated!
Attachments
Eastover Patrol.pdf
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TheForgottenHero.pdf
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Last edited by wwwwwww on Fri Aug 03, 2018 2:43 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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chiisu81
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Re: The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Thu Nov 02, 2017 7:29 am

PDF version added.
I like to point out spelling mistakes and post GIFs.
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SmootRK
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Re: The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Thu Nov 02, 2017 8:26 am

chiisu81 wrote:PDF version added.
Nice. But this means you probably need to lock down a "fiction" section in the Style Guide. :?

Anyway. Great start. I would love to see more of this and encourage others to share such fiction as well.
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chiisu81
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Re: The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Thu Nov 02, 2017 1:34 pm

Don't know if we'd ever need to formalize that ;) I just made it easier to read, esp. on a tablet/phone. Maybe if one day we could put together a fiction anthology...
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Re: The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Thu Nov 02, 2017 4:59 pm

chiisu81 wrote:Don't know if we'd ever need to formalize that ;) I just made it easier to read, esp. on a tablet/phone. Maybe if one day we could put together a fiction anthology...
Appreciate the PDF conversion, sir!

If anyone has a BFRPG module (etc.) that they'd like to see someone tackle in short fiction, I'd love to collaborate and work with you. I really enjoy this stuff, and (with help from the RPG author) I try to stay as true as I can to the vision of the original product.

But obviously, you'd have to be comfortable with my writing style, which is why I included this short story...so feedback is much appreciated...even if it's cruel or essentially says "You can't write and you're wasting your time." lol

PS J.D. Neal's "Island In River" setting from AA1 is very attractive to me as a setting for a short story. Does Mr. Neal ever frequent these boards?
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Re: The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Fri Nov 03, 2017 4:51 pm

Some notes:

Definition of steppe: a large area of flat unforested grassland.

Don't need a dash in thirty-thousand. Do need it in blood-red, so that was right. http://englishplus.com/grammar/00000125.htm

... and I was going to read the rest but now I have to do something else. Gah.
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Fastjack2xs
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Re: The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Sun Jan 14, 2018 4:40 pm

While I'm not really a fan of short stories -- they end so soon that I never get the chance to become involved in the story -- I did indeed enjoy your writing. Even though the story was very abrupt you were able to capture and convey the emotions of the characters very well. I feel certain that if you really wanted to you could pump out longer stories that I could really get into. Anyway, thanks for the story and know that I am waiting for the longer stuff.
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Maliki
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Re: The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Tue Jan 16, 2018 8:47 pm

I enjoyed it, nice work.
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Re: The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Fri Jul 27, 2018 4:32 pm

Fastjack2xs wrote:
Sun Jan 14, 2018 4:40 pm
While I'm not really a fan of short stories -- they end so soon that I never get the chance to become involved in the story -- I did indeed enjoy your writing. Even though the story was very abrupt you were able to capture and convey the emotions of the characters very well. I feel certain that if you really wanted to you could pump out longer stories that I could really get into. Anyway, thanks for the story and know that I am waiting for the longer stuff.
Maliki wrote:
Tue Jan 16, 2018 8:47 pm
I enjoyed it, nice work.
Your kind words are extremely appreciated! Thank you!

Is anyone here actually interested in more of this? If not, I totally understand...fiction isn't for everyone and especially when it's an author you know nothing about. I have several of these types of stories written (some a little longer) if anyone is interested in more, but don't want to be an annoying ass about it, especially if most here have no interest.
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chiisu81
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Re: The Forgotten Hero (BFRPG Fiction)

Post Sat Jul 28, 2018 9:55 am

Absolutely, it's fun reading fantasy short stories! Go ahead and make another post on this thread with the story attached as a PDF (as we did for your first story), rather than a sep. thread.
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